Well, Aren’t You Creepy!

I had an unfortunate experience on transit today – I was getting on a crowded bus, and while standing at the front an older man turned, leered at me and said “well aren’t you pretty!”. I didn’t say anything, just smiled politely, signalling that I heard the “compliment” but didn’t want to engage further (was on the way to an audition). He continued, “How did you get to be so pretty?”. I said nothing and tried to walk past him. That’s when he stopped me and said “Why don’t you give me a hug?”. I very clearly replied “No”, and then tried to walk past him again. He then blocked my way past, moved closer to me and said “Cmon, just give me one hug.”
Without thinking, in a LOUD, clear voice so all my fellow passengers could hear, I said “Stop it! You are being innapropriate. Back off!” And like a dog who had been scolded he immediately shrunk and backed out of my way. I walked to the back of the bus as far away from him as I could get. He stood the rest of the bus ride staring forward and did not look at me again.
It felt SO GOOD!
Usually when dealing with transit or street harassment I just ignore it – but today I stood up for myself and in a moment I went from feeling very powerless in the situation, to having all the power. I highly recommend it.
wishing you all,


2 thoughts on “Well, Aren’t You Creepy!

  1. Good for you. Women need to have phrases that they can say in a very loud voice as you did. Things like: I don’t speak to men I don’t know. (I use this if harassed on the street by someone begging or trying to speak to me AND I keep walking) The police would say to keep at least at arm’s length before saying anything just in case of a weapon like a knife. (Scary but could be true) On buses and transit, a bit more difficult to get away but can always go up to bus driver and ask for the creep to be kicked off the bus! Bus drivers will do this gladly as they don’t need this type of harassment on their buses.

    I have seen younger teens/women (often English students from other countries) approached as these creeps figure they won’t do anything and try and answer the men. If I see this I intervene and speak to the man to stop bothering them and to go away. I also say this in a loud voice so others hear me. The teens/women are always grateful saying they didn’t know what to do. These ESL schools/colleges need to have a visit from a Vancouver Police officer to do a class for being assertive when out and about.

    Again, good for you. Tell your girlfriends what you did and what I’ve suggested too. Okay? Keep safe is the bottom line.

  2. Pingback: These boots are made for walkin (or biking, or bussing, or skytraining or cabbing…) | Hollaback! Vancouver

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